All The World's A Stage

“All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players.” – William Shakespeare.

Shakespeare's famous words are perhaps more becoming than ever before. Love and attraction is, after all, a performance - a scene played out on the stage of human chemistry and nature. These movie style scenes we strive to live within are dictated by narratives stretching back to human creation. As technology, communication and media's impact continuously dictate the way we live our lives, it also dictates our ideals and fantasies.

We all have a vague idea of the roles we are meant to play, enacted through stories and films that recycle the standard narratives of our cultures. Whether you're a damsel in distress or a hero there's always a set standard to what role social ideals push you into, and therefore, what you aspire to. While we've moved to greater independence, high flown careers and better choices these days, perhaps behind this mirage of contemporary life, we all have a deep need to be loved, though not necessarily in the conventional way.

I suppose I've been there - playing the role I'd idealised. Maybe the sweep of first love will always propel you to act your best and give it your best shot. First experiences and new feelings are foreign, and generally all we have to relate to are films and stories that capture what you're feeling. It's no wonder we try to re-enact our favourite love scenes and stories with people.

Perhaps I've always likened myself to the Carrie Bradshaw type, a writer, with a fetish for shoes, and an affair with the "What's shakin' baby” swoon-worthy Mr Big character. I'm not quite an optimist, anymore, and I'm not desperate to become a wife, or a mother, or even a girlfriend, but I have been bound to trying to perfect the movie style narratives I've wished for.

Though, I've been pushed into roles not right for me, by a director pointing his lead into the role he needed me to play. Maybe on some levels, you will always have a director in the relationship, someone trying to shape their partner into the star they fantasise about, and create the perfect script for a life with no limits. From my dancing/drama days I’d learnt that not everyone has stage chemistry and you won’t always adapt to someone’s directing style; and it seems to go the same for relationships.

I broke away from the bad movie scenes of my life only to be replaced by a new actress all too desperate to jump into my role, my costumes, my ways, the understudy who'd been lingering in the curtains of love long before my final bow was taken.

I'm not an actress, or a director pointing their star into what they see fit. I'm the writer and producer of my own life, choosing my own ending and never letting anyone dictate me. Too many people follow their lives and relationships on the beliefs that they should, due to the narratives that style convention into a guide to life and love.

I’m not going to fall into a predetermined script of life that the next Jane Doe or girl next door is also living, I’m going to edit out my scenes and live life as an improvisation – we all know that’s more fun.

I suppose, if we are all subconsciously living our lives and dream lives through pre-scripted tales and films, give me a kooky indie flick with a hottie for a lead, rather than a soppy chick flick with too predictable an ending.